Today sucked.
Last night upon returning from the hospital, little Corkie dog was doing her normal kicking activities. Those of us that know her know this is pretty normal activity. She was a bit excessive but seemed to calm and quiet herself if I turned down the lights and got things hushed in the house. She drank some water and was under her little blanket with her heating pad on.
This morning, she was at it again. I knew she had medication for the occasional times that this happened, but we hadn't been able to find any at dad's when we picked her up. I called Vicki. She was more familiar with this dog-she had owned Corkie's mom and her and I delivered Corkie and the rest of that litter in her walk in bedroom closet. She knew the vet dad uses and they allowed her to fill Corkies prescription medication. She drove to El Dorado Hills and picked it up and rushed to my house.
By the time she got to my house-Corkie was having a full blown seizure. We could not open her jaws to even try to get the tiny pill down her.
We wrapped her in a towel and went to the emergency vet up the street from my house as quickly as we could. It's halfway between here and the hospital dad is at so it's not more than five minutes away...
They didn't take very long to assess Corkie. The fit she was having had been going on for a while and we didn't realize it, possibly even from last night, even though she had drank water and seemed ok. She was...and I quote the veterinarian "having a seizure that likely induced a stroke and even if they gave her medication to calm her seizure, she is more than likely mentally gone by this point." It was firmly recommended to allow Corkie to be euthanized.
We just stared at each other. There are just not even words.
We left the veterinarian office in silence. $225.00 bill and Corkies baby blanket in hand.
My kitchen is empty. I feel a twinge of guilt-hindsight is 20/20. I'm so numb I can't see straight.
Per the advice of a new found cousin in Tahoe, I'm going to bed now. I'm just not going to think anymore today. I don't imagine I could if I wanted to.
Today sucked. That's all I have to say about that.
Randi Fay
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Corkie, Rest In Peace, darling, Uncle bobbySure ou'll petted wherever. What am I supposed do?
ReplyDeleteRandi Fay, I'm gong to Hp onthis one. I need\want a little peace
ReplyDeletevegibob
Just when I think I have no more tears...well I had to restock all the makeup and then just gave up on reappling. Here's the deal, I force fed Corkie her full first year of life. Allan loved her so much. I loved her. The first time I took her to the vet with a seizure I cried all the way there. They blasted her with lots of valium and she simmered down. Her spinal cord deformity from birth was severe and in my heart I knew someday this would happen. It is just really crappy timing. I sat in the vet's office and sobbed, I did not care that the whole waiting room was just staring at me. It did not matter. Honestly, Corkie had never spent more that a few hours away from Allan. It has been six days. Corkie simply died of a broken heart. Dogs know way more that we do anyway. At least now she is running free in heaven. God Bless her little spirit. ~~Vicki Dahlquist
ReplyDeleteI babysat Corkie a time or two, and what a personality that little tiny dog had! She was quite a gal! And rode Harley too!!! I'm going to miss Corkie, but I do believe, like Vicki wrote, that she died of a broken heart. She was Allan's baby - and Vicki, you have it right on - she's running free in heaven now. Thank you Randi Fay for taking such great, loving care of her this past week.
ReplyDeleteDiana Pierson
Randi Fay, I pray for peace that passes all understanding to engulf you and your family. I cannot even imagine what you all are going through. You were barely a teenager last time I saw you. It is clear that in addition to your Mom, Allan has a big part in you developing into the strong yet graceful woman you are today. You all are in my prayers. I wish I could do more. Traci Maricle
ReplyDeleteI sit here in shock, picked up my little maltese, and we both prayed for Corky to rest in peace. Vicky, Randi, and all of your family, Bless you again and again with all our love for everything you have and are enduring. I am oh so sorry for all of the pain...lovingly Sylvia
ReplyDeleteI do not know Allan very well, although my husband does, reading this blog today totally brought me to tears, I cannot even imagine the pain in your heart, and to be able to put this on the blog is amazing. My heart goes out to you and your family, and you will all be in my prayers. You are going through a very trying time and my heart aches for you!! Keep your faith in God.
ReplyDeleteCheryl
For such a big guy, Allan had a way with those little dogs. My chihuahua, Papita, was babysat by an unemployed Allan for the first 7 or 8 weeks of her life. She is now 5, and she sees Allan about once a year. When she sees Allan, she goes crazy!! She does 360's in the air, climbs up his legs and chest, whines to be picked up, licks and kisses him, parks under his chin, and just wants to be "under his wing", and does not want to come out! It is hilarious! I was once told that if you want to see the type of person someone is, see how they are/treat kids and animals. Corki was Allan's baby, and yes, She died of a broken heart, period.
ReplyDeleteRandi Fay, Vicki, and Allan;
ReplyDeleteYou gave Corky a remarkable life and don't ever forget that. Lesser people would have euthanized her at birth. All of you are amazing.
Randi Fay and Vickie, you did the right thing. She runs, barks, and rules in doggie heaven now.
Now Corky is on the other side and can help Allan. Spirit energy is always free.
In love, light, and gratitdue, Connie Vaughn
I had the honor of being with Corky Friday night and holding her an hour and a half, all the while knowing something was seriously wrong. Her little legs wouldn't stop kicking and other details I won't go into. All I knew to do was hold her, rock her and gently speak with her, all the while standing by the open sliding glass door where the rain was coming down and the breeze was cool; her tiny body was oh so hot. Finally the kicking stopped, I was able to be fully present with Allan's grandsons once again...we carried on playing hang man and sukudo, (I can't even spell it much less play it). Bradley continues to teach me.
ReplyDeleteLast night I read this recent posting about Corky's passing, yes I too was shocked. "Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God's world by mistake" is what can to my befiddled mind. Children and animals are my weakness. This experiance is a good reminder of how powerless I truely am and grateful to have been of service durning Corky's last hours.
My prayers continue for Allan, Randi Fay, my grandchildren Jacob, Bradley and Randi's two younger boys Ryan and little Ollie. The little ones don't understand, or maybe they do, much more than us grown-ups.
God's speed one and all.
Nonnie
Corky is Allan's angel right now. As always, Corky will never leave Allan's side. What would we do without the love of our pets.
ReplyDeleteI am sorry to hear about Allans dog. How is Allan doing today?
ReplyDeleteI cant quite get over how incredibly wonderful you people are. These posts are so rich in love and generosity of spirit. For those of you who are capable of setting aside your own needs to instead consider what others may want or need...thank you. The journey is gut-wrenching and deeply stressful for this family. You have no idea how valuable and sustaining your quiet intercession is. You partner in this life beautifully. Heather
ReplyDelete